Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
We got a Christmas tree, decorated it to surprise his wife And kids who were out of town for her father's funeral, then fucked like rabbits on their new mattress before he had to pick them up at the airport.
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
I love you more than champagne and correct grammar
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
Maybe i don’t have a tell. Maybe wine is my poker face.
I use my feet as sexual weapons
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
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