Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
Don't need my thirties to be known as the decade of "new types of shits from drinking" like last night.
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
I can’t believe the first text I’m sending you from this phone was about how I just got fingered in a smart car on tin can hill
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
Randomize
