Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
i just picked a peanut m&m up off the floor. with my toes. and then proceeded to eat it.
Why does Thanksgiving make hot girls feel disgusting and fat girls feel horny? Its killing my prospects.
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
Opened the browser on my phone to a web search for midget birth rates per capita. A good night.
You are the human incarnation of a drinking problem
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
Last night he told me I was never sexier than when I was cutting pizza. Seriously. Like, he's perfect.
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
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