dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
I just found a 1/2 inch of mimosa in my shoe.
You should get more absorbent shoes.
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
Randomize
