That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
i woke up with someone drivers licenses in my wallet this am...he said i don't have a business card so just take my drivers license
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saved him in my contacts as "Has 2 kids.. don't drunk text"
it's great music for shaving your balls
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
Buying a large dominoes pizza for a wasted 3 mile walk is the best bad idea ever. My mouth is on fire, probably broke my hand, and i may or may not have eaten street pizza.
How did you break your hand eating pizza?
Boxes are hard to see rocks through.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
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