i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
i dedicated my morning wood to you.
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
no seriously, she's legit pissed i'm late to lunch because i was watching full house. there's obviously no future here.
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
We celebrated our relationship by shotgunning beers on his lawn in our underwear. I may have to marry this man...
There's no sexy way to moan the name Ernest. Or Ernie. This relationship is fucked
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
Randomize
