sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
Wipe that smile off your face.
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
21 People Confess What It’s Really Like At An Orgy
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
These 15 Honest Illustrations Show What Women Do When No One Is Watching
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
I'm actually pinning crap for Friendsgiving like a boss right now. These bitches better show up.
I just swiped right for a guy on Tinder solely because it looked like he was holding Zoboomafoo
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.