dude...i just woke up in ****'s bed!
doesn't he have a girlfriend???
yeah...who do you think woke us up...
What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
you left a paper here that says 'to do list' but it looks like you just wrote "drink a bunch of cough syrup and watch Who's the Boss" like 60 times
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk?
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
So there is a 50% chance that he just left my house and a 100% chance that I have to be up for work in 2 hours...
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
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