i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
You're 34. You can't make guys wait till the third date anymore. Step it up!
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
I couldn't break up with him while I was wearing a Hakuna Matata shirt.
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
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