My bottle opener just broke off in the cork
They don't teach how to cope w these situations in boy scouts
I wish there was an iPhone app to help you with your shitty personality.
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He keeps telling me he's gonna get me dope for my birthday. 1. HELP ME. 2. HOW IS THAT AN ACCEPTABLE BIRTHDAY PRESENT. Also, please HELP ME.
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
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