no weekend plans? you're practically married
just without the last name or joint bank account
i'd advise against both
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
Randomize
