Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
My liver is crying. And I feel like I got fingered by Edward Scissorhands. While he was wearing brass knuckles
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But you're the one who should be jamming foreign objects into my vaj instead of an old weird lady. I mean, it is your birthday....
I think I'm destined to be the stoner version of one of those successful but emotionally unavailable characters Sandra Bullock always plays in movies
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
If Dr Phil has taught me anything about myself, it’s that I can seriously relate to those women who fake their pregnancies.
Put viagra in his coffee. I did that with Geoff last month and three hours later I had bitten through a throw pillow and gotten a noise complaint from a neighbor
When the paramedic asked Logan how he fell he explained that he was trying to lick his eyeball, missed and tripped over his own tongue.
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