Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
You know that hot fire fighter I fucked yesterday? Well him and two other guys are killing the fire on my stove. Awkward.
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
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My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
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Just me, my martini, and my backup Martini.
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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