to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
This morning on my way to work I saw a guy ride his bike straight into a woman and her dog while trying to light a bowl. Thought of you.
There's some band that practices next door to my apartment. I'm thinking we may need to check that out. I could be like, "Hey boys, thought you might like some lemonade and vagina."
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
When I am this hungover I become increasingly grateful for having my own private office
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
Honestly, if you don't have a lawsuit pending against you by this time tomorrow, I'll be impressed.
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
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