Just mADE A PArabola og urine
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
I just found out that AAA will pick you up if you're drunk for free if you're a member. How did I not know about this?
If the EMT's ask later... I had 5 hour energy for breakfast and Four Loko for dinner... It might be important for them to know that
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
How was the picnic?
We played softball, except our team sucked. In one hand was a mitt, the other a beer.
Why didn't you put them down?
No beer left behind.
He said he'd prefer a photo rather than discuss politics, I sent him a snapchat "conservative shorts 4 conservative man". He said "be liberal"
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
Randomize
