Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
I think the only thing that impresses me are nice penises...and Jesus. Jesus would impress me. Especially if he walked on water again.
she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
Just passed a guy passed out on a riding lawn mower in his front yard.
the realtor just asked me if i've ever made meth on this property.... i need to do something about my hair
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
i have officially smoked myself stupid. went to wally world to buy soap and toothpaste but got 4 potpies and 2 dessert pies instead. fail.
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
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