maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
I'm driving in the middle of nowhere, and I just saw a stuffed Barney hanging from a noose on a tree. Maybe I should turn around.
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
I have a breathe right strip stuck to my forehead, several inexplicable bruises and I think someone tried to paint my nails with glue, but I still have my Santa hat. I'm gonna call this one a success.
We watched the first ever season of SNL and fucked for so long. He accidentally punched me in the face, but I mean, John Belushi was the background noise of our sex. I can deal with it.
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
Randomize