I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
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you passed out on the bathroom floor with the door locked. we had to break in and no one was sober enough to move you so they just threw a towel on you and stepped over you
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
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Road construction signs are deceptively heavy
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
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