I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
As of right now, my vibrator and a bag of snickers share the same drawer
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
I just fanned myself with my wet toothbrush to dry my mascara. Wtf
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
My orgasm happened in two different decades
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