As of this morning, vodka still has the other side of my BFF necklace. She treats me right.
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
so my pro life roomate found a used condom wrapped up in her sheets with your panties. never letting you have sex in her bed again
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
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