plz talk dirty to me
I feel like a bad episode of csi trying to figure everyone's DNA that's in me
Why is it only times like these when I'm scrubbing the cum stains off my futon before my family gets here that I seriously begin to question my life choices?
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
Got her pregnant in a minivan. Circle of life.
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
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