I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
You act like pregaming preseason hockey is a crime. Come on man, get fucked up and watch pucks. It rhymes so well it has to go together. DOS EQUIS Y DEVILS!
What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
My vagina just clenched in fear
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
Turns out naked yoga wasn't a pickup line. I feel betrayed.
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