wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
Giving me the bigger bowl of ramen isn't considered "romantic"
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
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