I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
What's sign language for "you may not be the father?" Kinda important right now.
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
they had to take the Corona's out of the fish tank because they wouldn't fit with the mini replica of the roman coliseum in there. so we drank the Corona's. does beer have an expiry date?
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
i woke up with a kayak in my amazon shopping cart with 1 wrong digit on my credit card and the transaction wasn't going through.
I was like, booze is the closest thing I have to a father. Don't pour daddy down the sink
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
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