but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
She said "You blew my mind last night." and I said "nah, I just blew my load." and her mom heard.
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
He kept stopping sex to whisper in my ear, and the only thing I could understand was "double stuffed oreos"
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
During my first week as an adjunct prof, I played a fiercely fought game of squash with a law student and we wound up having hot, sweaty, angry sex right on the floor of the court. She is either the best or worst thing to happen to my academic career. Will let you know.
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
Randomize
