I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
pick me up and take me to a bathroom i have to shit
no
the bathroom is right infront of the beerpong table
im sorry you werent invited but you live 2 blocks away PLEASE
He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
I have straight up perfected the art of amazing manicures with shaky-as-fuck adderall hands. Also, I'm way too proud of this.
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
Randomize
