Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
if you do not get any action from him tonight, I am personally walking my drunk ass over there grabbing his tongue and sticking it in your mouth. this is getting ridiculous
I standby a snuggie being perfectly acceptable attire for drunkenly walking your dog at 5am. Our new neighbors did not seem to agree.
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
How do you politely tell a guy that you only kissed him so he would shut the fuck up?
Randomize
