i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
You can't special order awesome
He dyes his hair, fake tans and lies constantly. What did you really expect from him?
A better fuck for starters.
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
I just used a beer funnel to put gas in my car
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
You told me you could hear my heartbeat through my penis but your methods were unethical.
Sixty five beats a minute. I stand by that.
Randomize