Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
Somehow ended up at a stranger's bridal shower. Everyone else is already drunk.
my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover
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