That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you left your dildo in my car
rules of finders keepers apply
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
you handed me the dorito you were about to eat and told me to 'keep him safe' while you went to the bathroom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
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