I could have mohawked her pubes.
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
I wish I could tell you that the worst thing that happened last night was how he got thrown out of a stripclub for vomitting on the girl giving him a private lapdance. I wish I could tell you that and not be lying.
WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
What if our hands were octopus tentacles?
You're an idiot.
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
Everyone I slept with in 2016 is getting a Christmas card from me. Because I'm an adult.
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
