i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
There's nothing more uncomfortable than drifting into sexual fantasies on a roadtrip and realizing you have a boner with three other dudes in the car.
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
At second job interview this week. Wearing pants to hide pole dancing bruises. This my life.
pretty sure I just got a "sorry I have a new boyfriend" blow job. Confused, but totally ok with it.
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
I just set my mike's hard down and didn't want it to spill, so I held my finger up and told it to shoosh. I'm drunk.
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
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