I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
We thought you were crowd-surfing until we realized it was the bouncers throwing you out
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
Couldn't see or hear that well because she hit me on the back of the head with a bat. That is my excuse. Also the gin.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
Right when he gets off the plane they're going straight to a party where you're only allowed in with a bottle of whisky and they are given bullet proof vests.
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
Burnt my boob on a piece of hot waffle at work today..I feel like thats a new low point in my career..
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
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