I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
My shoe was in my mailbox this morning. I can't stay sober today.
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
The little girl I babysit saw pink plastic shot glasses in my car and asked what they were for and I told her they were princess teacups.
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
So I was at my annual OBGYN appointment and when she saw the bruises on the inside of my thigh she asked if I had been horse back riding...I think my burst of laughter then awkward silence answered the question for me.
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
