i may or may not be watching the land before time
a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
I just saw a girl drinking wine and walking her dog in footie pajamas and a mad hatter hat. First day of the new year and I think I'm in love.
I feel like you should put up a missed connections ad for this..
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
I think the cashier at 7/11 might be planning an intervention for me.
Randomize
