Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
Always thought my first night in jail would consist of fire and a bunny suit.
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
My landlord showed my apartment to a prospective tenant today and I had my vibrator and gun both chilling on my nightstand
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
I just tried to brush my hair with a can opener. Who gave you that brownie
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah I'm just gonna shower and drink a gallon of coffee and drunkenly write my research paper. It'll be fine
It's so hard to fall asleep when I can hear your genitals smacking against hers. I hate you with all the love in my heart.
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
I just got a text giving me an hour window for when my vibrator is gonna be delivered. If that's not awesome customer service, I don't know what is.
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
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