"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
Maryland truck stops are full of people with killer mustaches
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
The only thing I accomplished today was naming the bag of wine I've been drinking
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
She's walking to the bar while holding a fifth of fireball, talking on the phone and puking like its nothing out of the ordinary
Doesn't matter if you work at a funeral home. If the boss says get a keg, you get a keg.
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
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