I feel like I'm in dance class right now
As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
My parents showed me my IQ test from fourth grade, I'm shitting on my potential.
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
I don't care if we're married you can't just walk into the bedroom with a pizza box expecting to get laid
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
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