Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
sorry I didn't call you. I had your number saved as "girl that offered bj but didn't follow thru".
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
My brother just put in eyedrops to talk to my mom on the phone
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
Maybe don't sell him so much adderall next time. The other day during finals he was convinced that he could see the "molecules of life in the air" and kept reaching up slowly to grab them.
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
Turns out, the guy I'm casually fucking has a girlfriend who's cheating on him with my sister's boyfriends brother who I fucked last year. And my sex life has now come full circle.
Randomize
