i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
I'm so high I just tried to eat a hair tie thinking it was one of my pretzels.
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
Brightest idea yet: lets drink enough at ladies-drink-free nights to make up for the cost of tampons. Breaking even on having vaginas!
I CAN ONLY BE THE BIRDIE ON YOUR SHOULDER WHO LEADS YOU INTO BAD DESCISIONS
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
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