I like how you formally end text interactions, just turn your phone off or don't respond you pervert
I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
I'm worried I'm going to miss my flight so I set a series of alarms on my phone to act as checkpoints to make sure I'll be there. 2am-stop drinking; 4am-stop fucking stephanie, get some sleep; 5am-wake up, fuck stephanie once more; 6am-get to the airport
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
the cop asked if i was drunk and i responded with "breathalize me, cap'n". incidentally, he was a captain and i blew a .13.
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
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