When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
Bro... You handed me an ice cube from your drink and said "tell me if it tastes like pickles".
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
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