Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
Im sitting alone watching titanic. Drunk. Without pants. Holding a fishing pole. Im pretty sure im okay with all of this.
Grad practice is like a live scrapbook of my drunken sexual encounters
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
I think the moment I knew you were going to black out was when I told you how many shots you had already and you were shocked and then poured another one
Just woke up, shitty hungover, and realized that every article of clothing I slept in was backwards, bra included. Fuck you, gin. Fuck you.
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
Then you guys just all showered together...?
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
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