tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
It's like being the highest you've ever been, then doing about 20 shots, and chasing them with lines of coke. All while laying on the surface of the sun.
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
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