There is an old man sitting across from me. Phone rang and his ringtone is children giggling, I'm not safe here.
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
we were all too drunk to realize that the cat wasnt yours
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