just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
im afraid if i stop breathing i will turn into a porcupine
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just got high and swiffered the bathroom floor....2 for 2 on brilliant life ideas
We'll get you some ice cream, but no sprinkles. Sprinkles are for winners.
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
Randomize