Jennifer and I just ate like 4 jello shots w/ a guy dressed as inspector gadget. We are still in the capital building btw
I love Texas.
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
Just in case you forgot, last night you came home drunk and pissed all over my laptop. You owe me a laptop.
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
Randomize
