my vag is singing 'hurts so good' by john mellencamp
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
Fucked Zombie Jesus at a Halloween party. I need Plan B before I give birth to the Antichrist.
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
Don't tell me you're on acid again
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
Randomize