I was just curling my hair topless and I just burned my nipple. Ouch.
I feel like this woman may give her husband a hand job mid way through dinner. just saying.
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
I baptized my dog in my pool last night because he snapped at my party guests, how was your night?
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
The amount I want to die right now is not proportionate to the level of fun I had last night. Not fair.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
My boss spotted an injured PIGEON outside the front door this morning (at 3:30am) and requested that I catch it and take it to the vet. Catch it with what! Take it where!These requests have gone too far...
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
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