I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
A lesson I learned in the hospital....when you masturbate while attached to a heart monitor, it scares the nurses a lot.
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
Green mimosas i think yes
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
Got promoted and on my way out the door was informed that my beard makes my face perfect for riding. Today is gonna be a good day.
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
Randomize
