that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
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It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you put Adderal in the fishtank in the lobby? The fish are acting like Olympic sprinters. Asshole.
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
Hot guy next to me on the flight lives near my grandparents. There’s a 100% chance I end up drunk and naked in his hot tub
Happy Thanksgiving to me!!!
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