We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
how should i feel about a person who brings a box of eggo waffles on the plane as a carry on?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
Just read my long term horoscope. I'm not gonna get laid for another 2 years.
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
You don't want any of I have. Seriously. Its 80 proof rum that was 8 bucks for a liter. I'm afraid
I'm sure your liver is writing out a will as we speak
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
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